Tuesday, June 16, 2015

MORE

Some may say it was only a pre-conference, but yesterday's SFC event left a darn good imprint in my heart.  I left the venue feeling refreshed, as if I had just experienced a weekend retreat.  From the preparation, to the activities, to the talk, and all the competitions...it all lead us to know and understand God's love for us in a deeper way.  Mass was clutch.  I had a heart filled with joy throughout mass, and I was smiling and slightly tearing as I approached Him in the sacrament of the Eucharist.  I felt overwhelmed with joy and peace.  I prayed, "Lord, I am open to Your love."

And His love soon came pouring down on me about three minutes after I left mass.  It's not in the way one would picture an outpouring of love.  It wasn't in rainbows and butterflies.  It wasn't even in cute babies or puppies.  Nope...His love came down on me through a call for more work.  There is truly no rest for the weary.  A retreat "high" so short lived...I think it made history.  At least in my heart.

Really, Lord?  More?  I was just trying to enjoy the moment and Your Love.

And He replied, "Yes.  Love More."

I could go on and describe the next twenty four hours of my life but let me spare you the details of this emotional roller coaster.  Instead let me share my "pause" moment.  A "pause" moment, as defined by me, is that time where God tells me to shhhhhh.....be quiet.

It happened this afternoon at School on Wheels.  I volunteer to tutor homeless children once a month.  Summer is here, so the number of kids was a lot less than I am used to, and there were more volunteers there than I've ever seen before (which is good!).  Anyway, that said, I was able to just hang out and give attention to just one student (instead of the three or four we usually get at one time).  The situation today was that she wasn't feeling well.  I'm convinced she caught the flu, so her energy level was pretty low.  She wanted to color, try a crossword puzzle, and play games with me, so there was enough in her to make some effort in enjoying the afternoon.  At one point, we were reading, and I knew I just lost her attention.  I didn't want to feel like I was wasting my time, so I asked her, "Is there something else you wanted to do?"  She replied "No, you can just read to me."  I was hesitant because it didn't seem like she really cared for the story, but I continued the book we were reading anyway.

I don't know her "story".  I don't know her background.  All I know is that this girl was not feeling well, and I'm sure she just wanted to go home....but what does she call home?  These families are in temporary shelters, hotel/motels, or living out of their cars.  My heart aches thinking that she can't go "home" and crawl into the comfort of her own bed.  I don't know where she is sleeping tonight.

I was so pre-occupied in my mind with the million things I had to do...I didn't take enough time to stop and think of what this girl really needed.  At the moment, she just wanted someone to sit and read to her.  She just needed comfort.

And this is when God said "pause".

I paused.  I smiled at the girl to help her feel comfortable.  I read and she listened.

In my busy-ness, I forget HOW to Love More.  I've been too worried about making sure everyone knows about the theme of all of our conferences this year, that it has blinded me to actually DO.

Thank you, Lord, for blessing me with your love through service.  Thank you, Lord, for teaching me how to love a little more today.  In all that we do, may it be for Your glory.

Amen.

Thursday, June 4, 2015

CPRW

Christian Personal Relationships Weekend:  The retreat consisted of friends, food (BACON.), and lots of laughing.

We were there to learn, and the results were off the charts.  It's been a while since I've heard speakers get quoted or referenced after their talk.  Thank you.

*Disclaimer: no spoilers in this post.  Most things I got were taken from the speaker's sharing, so it'll be different the next retreat.  If it didn't come from them, it was just my own simple reflection.  You can apply it to any CFC SFC talk lol*

- I learned, "Don't take a picture of your food.  Just eat it."  Just kidding, I was reminded that technology can be useful but when overused, it can harm relationships.  My phone didn't go off all weekend.  Not because everyone I talk to was with me but because we had no service in the woods.  God is good, and the point was made.  Relationships were deepened.
- How far does God's love in you reach to others:  Friends?  Family?  What about strangers?  I keep asking people what their takeaway was, and this was one that stuck to me the most.  Does God's love run so deep within me that I allow the ripple affect reach to the third core: strangers?  Not as often as I probably could/should.  There's a safety factor and there's just a factor that sometimes I don't feel like speaking to strangers.  WWJD....?  Not be lazy or a snob!
- CARE-rection is the best kind of correction.  Don't be passive aggressive, people.  Just give it to me straight.  I most def left that talk with a list of people to talk to.  Kidding.
- THINK before you speak.  Is it Truthful?  Will it Help the situation?  Does it Inspire?  Is it Necessary?  Is it Kind?
- Loving with a wounded heart.  BOOM.  We all get hurt, we all have moved on.  But HOW have we loved with those wounds?  It was time to take out that bitterness and live in peace.
- Send off.  Love the world.  Let there be peace on earth, and let it begin with me.

I could share more and get mad deep, but I'll let you experience it for yourself some day :)

These words won't make me a better person if I just know about it.  I need to get off my ass and do something with it.  Why spend an entire weekend in the woods where there is no cell or internet service, bugs were trying to just devour you, and you get little rest....if you don't live to tell the tale?  YODO.  You only DIE once, but you get to live every day.  (Thanks, Jenn!)

Make it count.