Wednesday, September 10, 2014

down a dark trail

The days are getting shorter, the sky wants to sleep earlier.  Since we've moved to the new office, I have tried to take advantage of the quick route to Runyon Canyon for a post-work hike.  That's a happy hour I don't mind :)  I really enjoy hiking with my friend, Johnny.  He makes the time pass quickly with conversation, he's encouraging and tries to keep me motivated, but most of all he looks out for me while I go up and down the steep parts of the trail.

Me: "Go ahead, I'll meet you at the bottom.  It's getting dark, so I'm going to be slow."
Johnny: Takes my water bottle and offers to hold my phone so my hands are free.  "No, just follow me.  I'll go down the path and make sure it's not too slippery.  Just follow my trail."

Lord, you lead me down dark paths and I have noooo idea where I'm going.  There's a destination - the bottom.  It's not the final, but it's part of the journey.  Just as he would take his flashlight from the phone and light my path once in a while, you do the same by sharing messages with me at mass or through friends/family.  All I need is a little bit of light every so often so I can see a few feet ahead of me to make sure there aren't any major rocks I'll trip over or deep holes I could fall in.  Just the same, I need Your light, O Lord.  Every so often, just shine something for me to see that I'm not in danger.  Yes, I trust You just as I trust my friend not to lead me off a cliff.  His attempt at making sure the dirt was safe for me before I started downhill reminds me that You see ahead of me all the time.  You will always make sure I'm safe.  I may slip a little and even land on my butt, but I know to always get up and keep going down.

Johnny: "Don't sit down while coming down or you'll be too afraid to go the rest of the way.  Just keep going, you're almost there."  

Lord, You lead me ways that I wouldn't dare go on my own.  I want to pause and take precaution, but the more I stop the less I want to move forward.  The fear kicks in.  The caution overtakes my trust in You.

Johnny: "You're almost there, this is the easy part.  You've already gone through the hard part."

Really, Lord - is this the "easy" part now?  Do I keep going down a path that I feel like You're leading me through, even if it's dark, scary, steep, and somewhat slippery?  I felt safe earlier in our journey together.  Then the sun set pretty quickly and it freaks me out a little to walk as the light goes away.  Yes, once in a while I have these bursts of peace and wisdom - Your flashlight shines on my path.  My trust is not 100% and I need to fix that.  If it weren't for my faith and trust in Johnny, I would have taken a lot longer on the trail.  That just means more time in the dark rather than being safely off the path.  Help me to trust You in the dark, as You are there to light and guide my way.  I just need to look a few feet further ahead of me and not just focus on the step in front of me.  There is more to this that I have yet to see.  I think that if I give it more time, I'll be able to see further down the road where You have gone.

What's #30daysofmystagogia?  You can refer back to my blog on "About Time" to understand the meaning behind this project.

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